Christians for Hire

Things are coming down heavy lately, are you ready? Decorated resumes being handed in by the dozen at the pulpit. Raise your hand, are you Christian? Ok, good. We’re not interested in your spare time or hobbies; don’t need to know where you’ve been or where you’re going for that matter. Please, they don’t need to hear any more about you… You have a good heart; wish nothing but good on everyone, while giving back to the community, AND standing idle waiting for someone to fail, so you can help them up of course. Well, thank you. Sigh- We seem to have blurred the significance… Now accepting applications! The ability to lift heavy fingers (while not necessary) acceptable, in some establishments.

Today I proved a theory.

I saw a video once of five monkeys that had been placed in a cage, in this cage, there was also a ladder and at the top of that ladder, bananas. The first thought of the monkeys was to climb up the ladder to get the bananas, however every time a monkey would attempt climbing the ladder the remaining monkeys would get soaked with cold water, which led to that monkey getting beat up by the rest of the monkeys, eventually no monkey attempted to climb. One of the monkeys was swapped out for a new one and of course, his first attempt was to climb the ladder and get the bananas, this only led to that monkey also getting a beating by the remaining monkeys after a few attempts the monkey didn't tr

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